You're Not Alone in Being Lonely.

Loneliness among young people is rising — not because there are fewer people around, but because connection has become harder to sustain.

Why it happens

Today's world offers more people to reach, but less reason to invest in any one of them. When contacts are infinite, relationships become disposable. Add to that a low tolerance for discomfort — the moment friction appears, it's easier to move on than to work through it. Inflexible expectations mean others are never quite good enough. Poor emotional regulation turns small conflicts into permanent rifts. And everywhere online, everyone is performing their best self — drawing vulnerable people into comparisons they can't win. Poor mental health sits underneath all of it, amplifying every negative experience until giving up feels like the only sensible choice.

"The more people we can reach, the less we truly know anyone — including ourselves."

What actually helps

Dealing with loneliness isn't about finding more people. It starts with building a life that feels whole on its own terms.

Address your mental health first. Anxiety and depression distort every relationship. Getting support isn't a last resort — it's the foundation everything else rests on.

Build multiple sources of happiness. Solo joy — a craft, movement, curiosity — and shared joy with people. Neither replaces the other. Both are necessary.

Invest depth, not breadth. One relationship you show up for fully — tolerating the friction, accepting the flaws — will outlast a hundred shallow ones.

Relationships can enhance happiness — but they are neither necessary nor sufficient for it. A full life is built from within first. People can add to it. They cannot be the whole of it.

Dr. Shishir Palsapure

Psychotherapist | MD (Hom), MSc (Psy)

Associate Fellow & Supervisor, Albert Ellis Institute

Morphic Minds, Nagpur

The Real Reason You Can't Say No

Most people say they *can't* say no. But that's not quite true — you *can*, you're just choosing not to. Understanding that difference is the first step to genuine assertiveness.

---

When saying no feels hard, pause and ask yourself three questions:

**What uncomfortable feeling am I avoiding?** Guilt? Fear of rejection? Anxiety about conflict?

**What am I predicting will happen?** That they'll be angry? Think badly of me? Leave?

**And if that happened — would it actually be the end of the world?** Would it make you a bad person?

Here's the honest answer: most of these predictions are either inaccurate, wildly exaggerated, or rooted in a moral rule you've quietly imposed on yourself — *I must never make anyone uncomfortable.* If a close friend declined the same request and the other person got upset, would you call your friend selfish or cruel? Probably not.

Look back at your own history. How many times did you say no and the relationship actually ended? How many times did you get "scolded" and it became permanent? And more importantly — what is the ongoing cost of always saying yes? Your time, your resentment, your self-respect.

---

**Start small.** Practice no in low-stakes situations — even while feeling guilty or anxious. Let the discomfort be there. Test your predictions against reality. Stop treating the other person's disappointment as your personal failure.

As your confidence builds, move to higher-stakes situations. You'll find the feared outcomes rarely arrive.

And when you do say no — say it **Kindly, Firmly, and Clearly.**

**KFC.** That's the whole recipe.

Dr. Shishir Palsapure 

Psychotherapist