The hidden truth about Social Media Wars

Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a Facebook argument, feeling increasingly frustrated, anxious, angry, hurt, and shocked? You are not alone. Be it a political, religious or any controversial topic, a comment can quickly escalate into an argument, leaving you upset and restless till you win the argument. As elusive as the 'win' can get, you are almost there, and then presented with another argument, allegation, or a fact that only leads to a chain reaction.

There are some reasons why social media wars are the way they are:

1. When someone posts an angry post they already have negative beliefs against that person, community, religion, country, or ethnicity. Often such beliefs and possibly biases develop over many years, are deep-rooted and can be very strong.

2. When someone counters them (the poster) on social media, they come up with counter-argument and/or instigate the commenter.

3. The war becomes two-fold then (for both the parties)-
          a. Protecting their original deeply rooted belief
          b. Protecting their original stand in the public display

4. If the other party gets instigated, the argument escalates and leads to more and more hatred, anger and other negative feelings.

5. Neither of the parties give up or say 'Ok, you have a point, and..'  (unless their interpersonal relationship is super tight and filled with respect).

6. To relieve the discomfort, each party holds on to the fight, just like a gambler holds on to a losing game.

6. Sometimes, they give up the argument or block the other person when it reaches their tipping point, but they don't give up their beliefs. 

Another trigger comes up, and the cycle repeats. Finally, many of those who can manage to not get instigated, to not get triggered, to not believe in all the criticism that's thrown at them, and are able to see the futility of such 'discussions' can refrain sooner or later from getting sucked into the quicksand.